"We're not worthy."

Today we’re going to talk about worthiness. The worthiness of God versus our own unworthiness.

Sometimes I like to think I’m good at stuff. Sometimes I even like to think I’m really good at stuff. God’s gifted me with a lot. I got a brain. A special one that sometimes feeds into my gigantic ego. In high school, I didn’t study and got all A’s. I barely tried and graduated second out of 550 kids. Yeah, sometimes I think I’m the bomb. Then when it comes to my classroom, I am not half bad either. I get raving reports from the principals when they observe and for all the kicking and screaming my students do, they like me. They know they are learning a ton and that I’m good at what I do. So I’m, you know, I’m pretty worthy...

Well when I put myself up next to God though, things come out a little bit differently. Check out Psalm 145. Psalm 145 is David, this kicking king’s praises (or according to Mr. Webster, David’s warm approval) of God. The book of Psalms is unique in the way that it is God’s Word to believers and it also the believers’ words back to him. You can read the Psalms as God’s word to you and learn about him and his ways AND you can pray and worship him the way he intends by praying them back to Him. The more you read and learn about God’s character, the more you’ll find it easy to worship him.

Take a closer look at verses 3,4, and 5. David is acknowledging how great the Lord’s works are. How people (one generation) will commend Him for His great deeds. Well, I’m teaching in North Philly. That’s pretty great. People commend me all the time for what I’m doing. Then there’s David, the guy actually writing this- he stepped out in faith and courage stood up for Israel by defeating that Philistine Goliath. He was this fantastic king who led a great army to many victories. So yeah—People commended David for what he did, too. Maybe David and I aren’t half bad.

Then we move on to verses 7, 8, and 9. I’m kind of those things, but now I’m stetching it. I bet David would be too. God is slow to anger. We move on about who God is and I’m done. There is absolutely no way I match up to any of this. I am so incredibly not like God. No matter how hard I try, I am not faithful to all my promises. I just can’t do any of that stuff to the extent God does it.

Think about in Wayne's World when Wayne and Garth meet Alice Cooper. It’s because of the posture Wayne and Garth take towards Alice Cooper. Now I’m not saying Alice Cooper is worthy of praise, but if we think of this as a type of model of worthiness versus unworthiness. Wayne and Garth realize they are teeny, tiny in comparison to Alice Cooper. I mean they need back stage passes to get into his dressing room. Everyone’s dying to get backstage to talk to Alice. He’s full of incredible information. He’s like a rock god. And then there’s Wayne and Garth – nobody’s. They were lucky to get backstage passes and be permitted to enter into the presence of Alice Copper. Not only that – Alice Cooper invited them to stay and join him. Bam- Wayne and Garth drop to the floor to acknowledge their unworthiness. They’ve compared themselves to Alice Cooper and realized this is the guy to be worshipped. They even say, we are scum. They know the chasm or great divide between themselves and Alice Cooper. Now that was just an analogy, but think about Wayne and Garth’s response to their god…or we might better term him…an idol.

Now stepping aside from Alice Cooper and moving onto our God, the true God worthy of all praise. When I compare the character of me and of God in Psalm 145. Bam – It’s clear I’m not worthy of any earthly praise, but this God-dude is worthy of it all. God is totally worth worshipping. I am humbled by the fact that no one is going to remember how I taught or what I taught 20 years from now. My focus is not on being remembered or being worthy of other peoples praise. My focus is on giving credit where credit is due. To the God who created me to do His work. I am humbled by how much time I waste thinking about how I can get other people to notice me when I could be getting other people to see God…someone actually worthy of serious worship.

the gift of youth ministry

youth ministry is a frustration sometimes when you want students to understand the love and sacrifice of God and they just say, "that's nice, but i'm going to do my own thing."

the gift though...when a student comes back after going away for awhile and says, "this Jesus stuff is real. i'm sold out for it."

Kingdom wins. they are my favorite.

nobody wants a deb at the party

nobody like debbie downer. she's no fun. she actually sucks the fun out of the room.

my goal after all that's been going on: don't be a deb.

Thank you to The Supremes.

Dude! I love this song. All the lyrics are totally legit...thank you to The Supremes for putting lyrics to everything I feel!

Why do you keep a coming around
Playing with my heart?
Why don't you get out of my life
And let me make a new start?
Let me get over you
The way you've gotten over me

Set me free, why don't cha babe
Let me be, why don't cha babe
'Cause you don't really love me
You just keep me hangin' on
Now you don't really want me
You just keep me hangin' on

You say although we broke up
You still wanna be just friends
But how can we still be friends
When seeing you only breaks my heart again
And there ain't nothing I can do about it

You claim you still care for me
But your heart and soul needs to be free
Now that you've got your freedom
You wanna still hold on to me
You don't want me for yourself
So let me find somebody else Hey!

Why don't you be a man about it
And set me free
Now you don't care a thing about me
You're just using me
Go on, get out, get out of my life
And let me sleep at night
'Cause you don't really love me
You just keep me hangin' on...

Why teach?

I've been having to answer this question a lot lately: What is my teaching philosophy?

My dream is to see the achievement gap close in my lifetime and I teach with that mindset everyday. The achievement gap is real and it is one of the most (if not the most) pressing social issues America faces today. Teaching in a high needs classroom well is one of the most direct ways that I can make a positive impact towards closing the achievement gap. When I became a teacher, I committed to the relentless pursuit of excellence in teaching (i.e. high quality instruction). This commitment is one of the most important qualities of an outstanding educator.

Teachers are classroom leaders. Their role is to lead students to academic success. What is easy to casually write in an essay is much harder to enact in a classroom. I think that teachers can lead students to academic success by first understanding what their students bring to the table (and they bring a lot). It would be ignorant to assume that I am the only one in the classroom with knowledge because I have been assigned the role as teacher. Each student brings a wealth of knowledge from his or her personal experiences and it is important as a teacher to tap into that wealth of knowledge. Knowing what your students know is only part of teaching. The next essential step in leading a classroom to academic success is motivating the class to desire academic success. In my classroom, we do this through goal setting. We have a large classroom goal for the year and students have individual goals for the year. As the year progresses, we reflect on our progress towards our goals and we recommit to achieving academic success regularly.

I think that a major part of my teaching philosophy is to model what I expect from my students. If I expect excellence, I must then model it. This requires me to be prepared for my lessons, working relentlessly, transparent in my mistakes, full of integrity, and open with my own goals and reflections of my goals. What may seem like lofty goals have been actualized in my classroom. My students have scored an average of 80% or above on assessments, which indicates a mastery of the subject.

In addition, I deeply desire that students leave my classroom with more opportunities than they had before. Part of those opportunities is excellence in academics, which I discussed before, but there are other facets to increasing opportunities for my students. I think that it is important to paint pictures of where students can take their education, so we focus on possible careers that are applicable to their lives. I also think that it is important to come alongside students as a mentor-like figure and offer guidance not only about future careers, but present jobs, possible internships, conflict resolution, and higher education. I am committed to my students achieving success beyond my classroom.

Blogging about it? How apropos.

Well, my last post involved risk taking. God put the challenge down to me...and I posted it in the cyber world, which mildly was an attempt to make myself accountable to be a risk taker.

I took the risk. I got rejected.

And so, I don't know how I feel about this risk-taking business once again. Questions are plentiful. Trust is wavering and being renewed simultaneously. Hope is a distant feeling.

Jeremiah 29:11-14

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you,” declares the LORD, “and will bring you back from captivity. I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you,” declares the LORD, “and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile.”

Time to crack open Jeremiah. This is the book that's going to guide my restoration.

risk taking

I have always considered myself a person who takes risks. I make choices that give my mother stomach ulcers from worry because she always assesses the risk as too big. I am the first to volunteer to jump out of plane. Or possibly even more risky, work in North Philly with teenagers. I immediately on joining the rugby team in college and somehow survived living in Russia.

This weekend there was revelation: I am not a risk taker when it comes to my heart. I don't have great concern about physical risks, but emotional ones, now that is a different story.

God spoke this weekend. It was clear. The wall has to come down. Now, will I take the risk?